Say we want to start a restaurant. In this restaurant, people will eat steaks. So we will have to have knives. Which people might use to stab each other. So the answer is: we need to make our customers sit in individual cages in order to protect them from each other.
I'm not really sure I agree with him. Unfortunately, I find that, although they are perhaps in the minority, there are a significant number of people in the world that would choose to exploit and even endanger others if they find it expedient to making an extra buck. Some seem to enjoy it, and will choose to hurt others when the alternative is just as convenient. So I guess you need to draw a line somewhere. Should we be able to post plans for making a nuclear weapon on Wikipedia? My opinion: clearly not. Should we cage steak-knife wielding diners? Probably not - it depends on the neighborhood where the restaurant is located, I guess.
I was contemplating all of these deep thoughts when my cell phone buzzed, vibrated, and emitted its "waterfall" ringtone. It stopped before I could silence it, and the caller ID showed "Lorie@cell". This was our code that meant that she had arrived safely in town. By ringing my phone, but not allowing the call to complete, we managed to convey information without incurring the outrageous roaming and long-distance fees that we feared Cingular might inflict upon us by using our "emergency only" plan outside of our home area.
So I waited for Jimmy to finish talking, then simply threw caution to the wind and called her back from my phone. So much for toll avoidance (I just got the bill - that 3 minute phone call cost me over $10. JEEZ!). She had grabbed a shuttle at the airport, and was currently waiting as passengers were unloaded at New York, New York. We made plans to meet for lunch.
I checked the agenda, and couldn't find a single presentation that I had a molecule of interest in sitting through. Don't tell my boss, but I decided to blow off the next session and take an early lunch. I found her at our room, and we went back to the Venetian to have lunch at an "outdoor" cafe in the Canal Shops area. It was inside, of course, but out in the open area, under the painted sky ceiling. It was nice, and a human "statue" arrived and "performed" just outside the restaurant while we ate.
After lunch, we roamed through the Venetian, and stumbled upon a wax figure of Luciano Pavarotti (advertising for Madame Tussuad's, which is an attraction at the Venetian). Then we found (fanfare music...) The Gelato Stand! It was outrageously expensive, like $5 for a single scoop, but it was AWESOME stuff. Lorie had a cappuccino cone, which was good, but we both agreed that my dish of pistachio truly approached perfection.
Too soon, it was time to attend more Powerpoint slide shows. I said goodbye to Lorie, we parted ways, and I proceeded to allow my mind to be filled with the glory that is HP Business Information Optimization. Oh joy, oh rapture!
I skipped the Mexican food at the "Partner Showcase" that evening, and Lorie and I went to the pool. It was really nice. The water was cool to approaching freezing near the "waterfall". We also tried the spa, which was nestled in a secluded area set apart from the rest of the pool by trees and shrubs. It was near the bar, so we decided that we had to sample their Pina Colada. It was pretty good, but we didn't get a pineapple, so we were somewhat disappointed.
We stayed at the pool until they kicked us out at 8:00. Every 5 minutes for the last hour, it seemed, they made an announcement: "All pool areas will be closed in X minutes." The staff were busy folding up chairs and putting away rafts, all the while telling us "We're not running you off! You don't have to leave," then giving us a look that said, "Would you kindly move your crap so we can get this area cleaned up and go home!" Too bad, pool employees, this was our only time to swim.
After they finally managed to expel us from the pool area, we cleaned up and decided to walk to dinner at the Ellis Island restaurant - a favorite of the TripAdvisor crowd. On the way, we explored the Bellagio for quite a while. Lorie was fascinated by the Chihuly sculpture hanging from the ceiling. She wanted to visit the Conservatory and Botanical Gardens, and I did too, but I was getting really hungry, so we decided to exit the building. However, we got caught in the fountain show crowd, and decided to watch. After Frank Sinatra finished singing "Luck Be a Lady Tonight", the crowd slowly dispersed, and we tried to make our way towards Las Vegas Blvd. We finally made it, and realized that another show was about to start in 5 minutes. It was hard to believe that the Bellagio pond is so large that you aren't able to skirt it in 15 minutes, which is the interval between fountain displays. So, anyway, we decided to watch another show.
By now, it was after 10:00, and I was starting to become ravenous. We walked down Flamingo, past Bally's. And we walked and walked and walked some more. As soon as we got off the strip, things started looking decidedly seedy. Odd looking folks were walking by, standing around, speaking to themselves, etc. We passed Bally's and kept walking, trying to find Koval Street. Just as I was starting to think I couldn't walk another step, we passed the Westin Casaurina, where my company would have preferred that I had stayed. Two filthy men were sleeping in the bus stop shelter in front of this hotel. It was also an hour's walk from the Venetian, so my company can take that suggestion and stick it up its corporate wazoo.
Finally we arrived at Ellis Island. It wasn't exactly impressive, but I found it to be as welcome a sight as the immigrants must have found the actual Ellis Island to be. It was 10:30 or so. We went in and found a waiting list to get a table. They told is we would be seated in 20 minutes. Not enough time to actually walk to anywhere else, so we signed up and took a seat. I was shocked that we needed to wait for a table at 10:30pm.
There was some horrible karaoke being performed in the lounge, right next to where we were waiting. They were trying to compensate for lack of talent with excessive volume. The restaurant had a back room, and I was praying for a table in that section. "Smoking, Non-smoking, or non-Motley Crue?".
After 30 minutes, I noticed that no one had been seated since we arrived. The folks that were there before us were starting to look decidedly unhappy. 45 minutes of waiting, and people were becoming irate. A new hostess came on duty, and was immediately greeted with three angry parties of people demanding to be seated at once. She finally turned away from the hostess stand, kicked the kitchen door open roughly, and hastily left the area. Another employee arrived, and for some reason, taped a piece of note paper to obscure the "Ellis Island" emblem on the left breast of his polo shirt. Perhaps he was embarrassed to be associated with the institution?
After about an hour, I told Lorie that we needed to find someplace else to eat. She checked with the hostess (our original one, not the pissed off lady who was presumably still in the kitchen), and she said to give them just a couple of minutes more. Folks finally started to be seated around this time. After an hour and 15 minutes, we finally got a table. It was directly adjacent to the karaoke bar, still going strong and emitting loud, off-key Cher music. It was also directly under the ceiling fan, and it was cool enough inside that it was quite uncomfortable. This is ME, for those of you that know me, complaining that it was too cold.
I had one of their homebrewed beers, and it was really good. Lorie had the famous $4.99 sirloin steak dinner, which comes with a salad, baked potato, and some overly garlicked green beans. It was good, and certainly worth the price (although I'm not sure it was worth the walk and the wait and the karaoke). Our waitress was nice and not pissed off, thankfully. We asked her if we could turn off the ceiling fan, and she said, no, but she offered Lorie a shirt to wear. Um, no thanks, we don't want to wear your clothing.
Ok, so that didn't turn out as well as I had hoped. So we walked back to the Mirage. It was well past 1:00am at this point, but there were still folks pushing kids around in strollers on the strip. What are they thinking?
I'm sure we did some stuff on the way back to our room (gift shop? casino?) but I can't remember. My feet were throbbing and I was exhausted. I wonder if I managed to undress before passing out in bed.

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