If I had a million dollars...

One of my favorite movies is "Office Space". There's a scene where some cow-orkers are discussing what they would do if they had a million dollars. It's a question that was originally asked by one of the characters' high school guidance counselor. The idea is this, whatever your answer to that question, that's what you should do. Don't become a cube rat slogging out crappy software and kissing the boss's ass for 40 years in hopes of acquiring a miniscule pension that will allow you to retire so you can sit around in your autumn years without decent healthcare to wonder where your life went. Become the rock star, cancer researcher, entrepreneur, philanthropist, politician or whatever you dream of becoming. That's beginning to sound more and more like a very rational philosophy to me.

(Of course, the counter view is also presented in the movie: If everyone did that, nobody would be around to muck out the toilets.)

So, what would I do if I had a million dollars?

• Move to Hawaii. Probably Maui.


• Establish a luthery*, with two big picture windows: one with a view of the ocean, another with a view of the mountains. This would involve spending a year or two attending a school of lutherie, and working for a few years to learn the craft from an established luthier. I would build archtop guitars, as well as various other types of guitars, some violin family instruments, maybe even a lute or two.


• I've been reading Ben and Jerry's book about "Values-Led Business". Basically, in this book they say: "First, the most powerful institutions were religious, then governmental. Now they are commercial. However, in the past, the primary goal of the powerful institutions has been the betterment of society. Business has only self-interest as a goal, which if left to continue, will destroy society instead of bettering it. Business has a responsibility to improve society first, in addition to making money." This makes so much sense to me. So, in establishing my luthery, I would need to continually find ways to contribute to society. I guess the first thing I could do is establish an area of land where I would replant trees whose timber I used in the construction of my instruments. If they would grow, this would include cedar, maple, spruce, and mahogany. Since I'm on Maui, this would also include Koa, which is so beautiful, has become more and more rare, is ideal for instrument making, and only grows on the Hawaiian islands. Beyond that, I would do everything I could to continue the idea of a values-led luthery. (Although the business of providing music to the world has inherent value to society, in my opinion.)


• I've always loved vineyards and wineries, so I would set aside some land on which to grow grapes, and learn the art of winemaking. I've brewed my own beer in the past, so perhaps I could grow barley and hops too, and continue to practice zymurgy*. Maybe as part of a being a values-led vintner/brewer and luthier, I could establish a brew-pub/wine-garden that provides a forum for amateur musicians to gather and perform and learn from each other. Native Music and Dance on Tuesday Night, Jazz Jam Session on Wednesday Night, Slack Key Workshop on Thursday Night, etc. I suppose as a producer of alcoholic beverages, I would have a responsibility to host an AA meeting (at an alternate location) and provide information on moderation.


• I would try to provide the absolute best education to my children, with the understanding that an education is not complete without instruction in the appreciation and creation of music and art (something that appears to be disappearing in our public schools). I would send them to the best universities for their chosen professions, and I would try to instill in them the need to choose a profession that contributes to a better society.


• I think people need to be "off the grid" with sustainable, environment-friendly energy sources. At my home in Maui, and at my shop, I would install a fuel cell, windmill, and solar panels. If I were close to a waterfall, maybe I could experiment with hydroelectric generation. I would do my best to sell energy to the grid rather than buy it. I would look into alternative power plants for my automobiles (unfortunately, a million dollars isn't enough for a fuel cell vehicle, yet.) I would also provide an area at my home to grow vegetables, in the interest of approaching self-sustainability.


• In my spare time, I would prepare myself educationally to discover a cure for cancer.

I've been thinking a lot about this lately. You see, I've dedicated myself to the art/science of software development. I've earned a Bachelors degree in Business Administration with an emphasis in Data Processing, a Masters degree in Computer Science, taken countless vendor training classes, and spent 20 years trying to become the best software developer I can be. I've tried to make things better for my company's employees by providing the best network management environment possible. But that's not enough to me. I want to make things better for many more people.

Beyond that, the corporate world has voted me out. After 20 years of telling me that the world needs more computer scientists, and promising a rewarding life to anyone who decides to dedicate themselves to practicing the profession, it has suddenly decided that employing American software developers is way too much of a burden. Why pay an American enough to live in America when you can pay an Indian or a Phillipino 10% to do the same job. Is it as good a job? Well, maybe, maybe not. Who cares. Bottom line rules.

So, forget philosophy. Purely as a risk management move, I need to look at alternatives for providing a home and future for my family, since software development may very well not be an option for me in the very, very near future.

But wait, Indians and Phillipinos don't buy american telecommunication services, do they?

"So what?", says the CEO.

Well, it seems to me that if we ship all of our jobs overseas, then nobody in this country will be able to afford to buy domestic goods and services (since they will all be unemployed and homeless). Also, once that happens, the Indians and Phillipinos will certainly demand wage increases so that they will be paid the same as the displaced American workers used to be paid, right? They'll have a corner on the labor market by then, won't they?

"Who cares? By then, I'll have exercised my options and I'll be living on easy street, refolding my golden parachute. Let the next CEO worry about that."

Here endeth the rant. Have a nice day.

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* From the "Dulcimercraft" website:

The word Lutherie stems from the word LUTE. Essentially it means "the art of lute making". Once upon a time, if you wanted a lute, you went to a Luthier, who practiced Lutherie in a Luthery. The Luthery is the shop where the Luthier practiced Lutherie. Confused yet?

From The Free Dictionary website:

zy·mur·gy (n.): The branch of chemistry that deals with fermentation processes, as in brewing.